Hey Mom and Dad: What's the Best Approach for Raising Kids?

Hands on or hands off?

Welcome to "Hey, Mom and Dad"—a weekly feature in which we ask our Facebook fans to share their views on parenting. Every week, we get the conversation started by taking a look back at a question we asked parents the week before on Patch Facebook pages from around the area.

This week we looked at a hugely popular parenting blog that appeared on a Patch site outside of San Francisco. You can find it here. The blog has gone viral and has touched a nerve with a lot parents. 

In a nutshell, the blog centers on two different parenting techniques — one in which the parents hold their children closely and protects them from harm. The other allows the children to make mistakes and sometimes get hurt in the process. 

Here's what a few of our readers said about this week's question of: 

What's best for kids — a hands off approach that lets them fall down every once in a while or one in which parents try to protect their children from sometimes painful outside influences? 

Laura Ford: Parents that 'spot' their kids and give encoragement while they figure out how to get up the ladder. —on Beverly-Mt. Greenwood Patch Facebook

Jamie Marie Stahulak: Parents that stand at the bottom and guide them/cheer them on —on Palos Patch Facebook

Kimberly DeLude Quigley: Help at first once they get it....watch. —on Frankfort Patch Facebook

Megan Murphy Boss: I'm kind of the "stand behind them in case they fall, but let them try it on their own" parent. —on New Lenox Patch Facebook

Dawn Teeter Nicosia: Not sure that I know what is best. But for me helping was the way to go. My way is my way but that does not mean it is the best way.  —on New Lenox Patch Facebook

Laura Berry: Let them try but be a good spotter! —on Homewood-Flossmoor Patch Facebook

Violet Assaf: I am always there to help them. And when I want them to learn on their own, I am right next to them to catch them incase they fall or need a hand. —on Orland Park Patch Facebook

Kelly Rashaedeh: I'm a helper for sure. I don't like my kids to get hurt and don't feel like them hurting themselves "teaches" them not to do it again —on Oak Forest Patch Facebook

John Barker: Parents who give their kids just enough help to help them get themselves up the ladder - help them build the skills and confidence necessary to climg the ladder while keeping them safe. —on Oak Forest Patch Facebook

Jennifer Ballik-Eckner: We provided an example of how to go up the ladder and then down the slide. —on Tinley Park Patch Facebook

What's your take? Add your 2 cents in the comments below. 

Harleena Singh January 24, 2013 at 02:45 PM
Great question and discussion. I feel parents need to change their approach according to the demands and the situation but there's no harm letting them fall once in a while if you feel it will serve as an important lesson for them provided it doesn't have adverse consequences. Let children be on their own but parents should be their guiding angel. I wrote a post on the parenting styles http://www.aha-now.com/is-yours-the-most-effective-parenting-style/ where I talk in detail. And my latest post which went viral recently http://www.aha-now.com/7-lessons-to-tell-your-children-about-purpose-in-life/ sheds more light on what parents should do to help their child. Thanks.


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